From random times this semester:
I just have to consummate my speaking paper. (last step of a process essay about prepping a meeting)
I went to the tonsorial shop for my hair cut.
Last week I watching movie. That movie is very hot. (from oral post-tests-can't remember the question or imagine what it could have been to get that response)
Sunday is the first day of a week. (response to describing a typical day of the week)
My father, he often go to bed with somebody [...] it is bad [...] maybe it is good (who do you admire most?)
Everyone make a drink (I think this was a mispronounced "dream")
My major is civil engineer, I want to be an architecture. (At least he knows his word forms, if not when to use them)
I frown upon ghosts. (vocab sentence for "frown upon")
We can see many loose boys and girls in the foreign films. (sentence for "loose")
He has hygienic hobbits. (sentence for "hygienic". may have been badly written "habbits")
The next round of essays should be fun.
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Stereotyping
Two weeks ago, my students took quizzes and the results were, as we say here, "less than delicious". One thing they need work on is "fast reading"- basically a skimming and scanning exercise with yes/no/not given answers. At my level, they are expected to read 400-450 words and answer 5 questions in 5 minutes . They tend to just answer from what they expect to read rather than the content of the passage, so I decided to write something completely false to see what would happen. Here is the edited version (to make sure they are not offended).
Stereotyping China- Fast Reading
Despite what you might have heard to the contrary, the stereotypes are true: all Chinese people are the same. They all have black hair and eyes, they basically all wear glasses and they are all smaller than the average westerner. Wandering around a big city in China, it is often difficult to remember where you are and where you have been since you feel like you are seeing the same person over and over again.
While to ignorant people it might seem that similarities would only be skin-deep, Chinese people really do not differ as much as you would expect. They see rice as a basic part of their nation’s cultural fabric and as a result will eat it at least three times a day. Even at breakfast, Chinese people manage to get their fill of rice through porridge, or ‘zhou’. For everyone, from small children to the elderly, it is seen as ‘un-Chinese’ and disrespectful to refuse rice if it is offered. The nation-wide pastime of tai ch’i is just as common as movies would have you believe. It is impossible to walk past a park without seeing at least 20 or 30 old people in traditional white outfits gracefully moving their limbs in a tranquil way.
It is often said the Chinese nation is a one of proficient martial artists. Since the population of this country is so abundant and the resources can be very scarce, everyone must know to defend him or herself. After school is over (sometimes as late as 9 p.m.), children gather at wushu schools run by monks from such temples as Shaolin. There, they are put through long drills of kicks, punches and weapon handling, during which they can be seen jumping between posts, flying through courtyards or even easily balancing on one leg for hours at a time. Girls learn to handle small knives, light swords and long bamboo poles while boys become skilled in the use of spikes, numchucks and wide blades. As adults, Chinese people keep up their skills by taking part in yearly wushu competitions and occasionally fighting for their honor. Crimes such as murder and theft are much higher in China than anywhere in the West due to these skills, but rape statistics at almost at zero as no one would be foolish enough to attack a woman trained in these lethal skills.
The last national Chinese trait that should not be missed is an impressive ability to solve any mathematical problem available. Schools, of course, instruct children in Confucianism, Chinese calligraphy and music (all children play the guzheng or erhu) but without mathematics, a child’s education would not be complete, by Chinese standards. As soon as a child is able to count on his fingers, he is given math problems to solve every night. By the age of 13, most Chinese children can solve the ‘quantum simplex’, an arithmetic problem that confuses many Western scholars. (488 words)
Questions: (Y/ N/ NG)
1. There is a wide variety of typical Chinese facial features.
2. All Chinese people have rice as a necessary part of every meal.
3. Tai ch’i is a good way for old people to keep their bodies healthy and flexible.
4. If you are a woman, you are more likely to suffer from rape than murder in China.
5. A Chinese child who immigrates to Europe will always be better at math than his classmates.
Stereotyping China- Fast Reading
Despite what you might have heard to the contrary, the stereotypes are true: all Chinese people are the same. They all have black hair and eyes, they basically all wear glasses and they are all smaller than the average westerner. Wandering around a big city in China, it is often difficult to remember where you are and where you have been since you feel like you are seeing the same person over and over again.
While to ignorant people it might seem that similarities would only be skin-deep, Chinese people really do not differ as much as you would expect. They see rice as a basic part of their nation’s cultural fabric and as a result will eat it at least three times a day. Even at breakfast, Chinese people manage to get their fill of rice through porridge, or ‘zhou’. For everyone, from small children to the elderly, it is seen as ‘un-Chinese’ and disrespectful to refuse rice if it is offered. The nation-wide pastime of tai ch’i is just as common as movies would have you believe. It is impossible to walk past a park without seeing at least 20 or 30 old people in traditional white outfits gracefully moving their limbs in a tranquil way.
It is often said the Chinese nation is a one of proficient martial artists. Since the population of this country is so abundant and the resources can be very scarce, everyone must know to defend him or herself. After school is over (sometimes as late as 9 p.m.), children gather at wushu schools run by monks from such temples as Shaolin. There, they are put through long drills of kicks, punches and weapon handling, during which they can be seen jumping between posts, flying through courtyards or even easily balancing on one leg for hours at a time. Girls learn to handle small knives, light swords and long bamboo poles while boys become skilled in the use of spikes, numchucks and wide blades. As adults, Chinese people keep up their skills by taking part in yearly wushu competitions and occasionally fighting for their honor. Crimes such as murder and theft are much higher in China than anywhere in the West due to these skills, but rape statistics at almost at zero as no one would be foolish enough to attack a woman trained in these lethal skills.
The last national Chinese trait that should not be missed is an impressive ability to solve any mathematical problem available. Schools, of course, instruct children in Confucianism, Chinese calligraphy and music (all children play the guzheng or erhu) but without mathematics, a child’s education would not be complete, by Chinese standards. As soon as a child is able to count on his fingers, he is given math problems to solve every night. By the age of 13, most Chinese children can solve the ‘quantum simplex’, an arithmetic problem that confuses many Western scholars. (488 words)
Questions: (Y/ N/ NG)
1. There is a wide variety of typical Chinese facial features.
2. All Chinese people have rice as a necessary part of every meal.
3. Tai ch’i is a good way for old people to keep their bodies healthy and flexible.
4. If you are a woman, you are more likely to suffer from rape than murder in China.
5. A Chinese child who immigrates to Europe will always be better at math than his classmates.
Sunday, April 12, 2009
Student presentations
I have been bad at keeping up-to-date with my adventures here, but this weekend I have some down time so I thought I'd write up my notes on student presentations. As usual, for level 4, students gave presentations about original business ideas. Among the weird Chinglish and strange products, as few quotes stood out. "Pressure" was pronounced "pleasure" repeatedly (just think about "when you are facing much pressure, going to bed is very helpful" or "nowadays, women face many pressures in life" or "people are slaves of pressure").
In my first class:
"Do you want to enjoy your lovers on valentine’s day?"
"help the students while hunting jobs" (I'm thinking... with a gun)
"our slogan is... "magic"" (accompanied by a grandiose arm-swoop- you could almost see the cape)
And my favourite- A group promoting a "superstar factory" where they can make you famous, beautiful or whatever. The whole presentation was pretty good, but the highlight for me was one of the students, John (who was in the musical last semester for EF and is kind of a clown) who was supposed to be a girl who is ugly (holds up picture of ugly face with glasses/ pigtails/ warts etc in front of his head) then is turned beautiful (flowing hair, thick lips and large eyes) by the service. He spoke in a falsetto voice, shook his arms (and cardboard face) at the sky in desperation at "having everything, except friendship and love... because I am so ugly!!" and scared people into crossing the street by his/ her ugliness. His switch into a low announcer/ tv-presenter-style voice for the end of the commercial ("and now, if you want to contact us, don't hesitate to dial...") was the icing on the cake.
Class 2 was less delicious, though still quite quote-worthy.
There was "Dig truth" the P.I. company that will solve all cases, including "high-tech crime, love triangle, economic crime" and promised to work with black and white people, out of their 221b Baker Street address.
Two students promised: "We will only service people once in their life" (I believe about a wedding service so successful you'll never divorce).
A tea shop suggested that "if your product is equal to rubbish, if you don’t have to advertising".
There was a travel agency that made people use their imagination to see great sights. When a reporter joined a tour and questioned the methods was murdered by the guide.
One used the slogan "Yes, we can!" repeatedly and emphatically to tell us how good they were at solving all sorts of sartorial, behavioral or financial problems. The moment when one student pretended to strip and change into other clothes was priceless, as was the response of "who made you look this stupid?!" from the kindly assistant.
Finally, a punching-bag company promised any way to "release yourself" would be made available to you to avoid pressure ("pleasure") from overwhelming you, because suicide and killing parents and friends would really be a pity. (Imagine this being said in a very peppy tone)
Class 3 has my outgoing students but sadly, their presentations weren't quite as memorable, weeks later. My notes read like this:
Falsetto- help! Help me! I can’t see you!- lion: oops- my supper! (this was to advertise glow-in-the-dark clothing to be worn during safaris to avoid getting found and eaten by lions when you're looking for help)
1/3 of our life is spent on the bed- pillow is a very important part of our bed. If have 2 dream pillows, can share dreams. It smells good, but be careful that the pillow can’t be eaten! Complementary pics on pillows to make “romantic pairs” (in reference to special pillows to help you dream better and, I think, record your dreams)
“rear-service”- Cindy… not sure what that means. Company Escort service. Symbol similar to “ming” (cuddly sun and moon) spooky bodybuilder/ soldier “if you feel lonely, come this way →” we have 1G RMB- I am so happy (this group offered escorts to help you with any situation you need- visiting parents, outings, protection etc... I'm still unsure about what 'rear-service' is, but they were very excited about starting their business with 1,000,000RMB as they mentioned it at least twice).
enjoy life, enjoy housea? Oh, you know, I hate my life, I want to have a look. Q&A session- 1G RMB- so cheap? (this group offered houses built on the sea that are basically houseboats. The customer who was fooled into parting with 1,000,000RMB for one seemed quite happy about his bargain during the interview he gave.)
L&F- love and flowers (and puppies?)- boy playing a girl- as usual… dancing- translate The Song- awkward date “don’t you want to say something else?”- “I love you” to Rachel- shock. shut up! Who says I have a gf?- hugs- weird falsetto (students chant “kiss kiss”) (bear in mind that Rachel is a male student and the group was mostly male- they like to cross-dress for oral tests. I can't say I remember exactly what was going on, except that the name of the company made me think of wandering around fields and listening to "the sound of music" and that flowers were supposed to solve all marital and realtional problems)
Robot woman to clean day and night (she will reinforce all stereotypes about what women should do for the house)
"You wish, I do". If you want to go to the moon, sorry not possible. But if you want to be king for one day, we will contact the people at gugong (Forbidden City) and do something. (We will make all your dreams come true... except the impossible ones).
In my first class:
"Do you want to enjoy your lovers on valentine’s day?"
"help the students while hunting jobs" (I'm thinking... with a gun)
"our slogan is... "magic"" (accompanied by a grandiose arm-swoop- you could almost see the cape)
And my favourite- A group promoting a "superstar factory" where they can make you famous, beautiful or whatever. The whole presentation was pretty good, but the highlight for me was one of the students, John (who was in the musical last semester for EF and is kind of a clown) who was supposed to be a girl who is ugly (holds up picture of ugly face with glasses/ pigtails/ warts etc in front of his head) then is turned beautiful (flowing hair, thick lips and large eyes) by the service. He spoke in a falsetto voice, shook his arms (and cardboard face) at the sky in desperation at "having everything, except friendship and love... because I am so ugly!!" and scared people into crossing the street by his/ her ugliness. His switch into a low announcer/ tv-presenter-style voice for the end of the commercial ("and now, if you want to contact us, don't hesitate to dial...") was the icing on the cake.
Class 2 was less delicious, though still quite quote-worthy.
There was "Dig truth" the P.I. company that will solve all cases, including "high-tech crime, love triangle, economic crime" and promised to work with black and white people, out of their 221b Baker Street address.
Two students promised: "We will only service people once in their life" (I believe about a wedding service so successful you'll never divorce).
A tea shop suggested that "if your product is equal to rubbish, if you don’t have to advertising".
There was a travel agency that made people use their imagination to see great sights. When a reporter joined a tour and questioned the methods was murdered by the guide.
One used the slogan "Yes, we can!" repeatedly and emphatically to tell us how good they were at solving all sorts of sartorial, behavioral or financial problems. The moment when one student pretended to strip and change into other clothes was priceless, as was the response of "who made you look this stupid?!" from the kindly assistant.
Finally, a punching-bag company promised any way to "release yourself" would be made available to you to avoid pressure ("pleasure") from overwhelming you, because suicide and killing parents and friends would really be a pity. (Imagine this being said in a very peppy tone)
Class 3 has my outgoing students but sadly, their presentations weren't quite as memorable, weeks later. My notes read like this:
Falsetto- help! Help me! I can’t see you!- lion: oops- my supper! (this was to advertise glow-in-the-dark clothing to be worn during safaris to avoid getting found and eaten by lions when you're looking for help)
1/3 of our life is spent on the bed- pillow is a very important part of our bed. If have 2 dream pillows, can share dreams. It smells good, but be careful that the pillow can’t be eaten! Complementary pics on pillows to make “romantic pairs” (in reference to special pillows to help you dream better and, I think, record your dreams)
“rear-service”- Cindy… not sure what that means. Company Escort service. Symbol similar to “ming” (cuddly sun and moon) spooky bodybuilder/ soldier “if you feel lonely, come this way →” we have 1G RMB- I am so happy (this group offered escorts to help you with any situation you need- visiting parents, outings, protection etc... I'm still unsure about what 'rear-service' is, but they were very excited about starting their business with 1,000,000RMB as they mentioned it at least twice).
enjoy life, enjoy housea? Oh, you know, I hate my life, I want to have a look. Q&A session- 1G RMB- so cheap? (this group offered houses built on the sea that are basically houseboats. The customer who was fooled into parting with 1,000,000RMB for one seemed quite happy about his bargain during the interview he gave.)
L&F- love and flowers (and puppies?)- boy playing a girl- as usual… dancing- translate The Song- awkward date “don’t you want to say something else?”- “I love you” to Rachel- shock. shut up! Who says I have a gf?- hugs- weird falsetto (students chant “kiss kiss”) (bear in mind that Rachel is a male student and the group was mostly male- they like to cross-dress for oral tests. I can't say I remember exactly what was going on, except that the name of the company made me think of wandering around fields and listening to "the sound of music" and that flowers were supposed to solve all marital and realtional problems)
Robot woman to clean day and night (she will reinforce all stereotypes about what women should do for the house)
"You wish, I do". If you want to go to the moon, sorry not possible. But if you want to be king for one day, we will contact the people at gugong (Forbidden City) and do something. (We will make all your dreams come true... except the impossible ones).
Your posterior is...
Most Saturdays, we play Frsibee with students. Different ones come each week, but there are a few we've seen repeatedly. One of them, a boy yesterday referred to as 'active/ good kid in white' is Philippe's student and not shy about getting very close to his opponents (sometimes uncomfortably close, in fact) or saying what he thinks. After Philippe slipped and landed on his butt trying to catch our flying plate and was picked up by another student (crazily playing in jeans and a button-down shirt), he turned to me and asked if he'd torn his clothes.
"No, but your butt is..." I started.
"Nice," added 'kid in white'.
I was going for "dusty", but whatever... Would it have been weirder coming from a female student? I can't tell.
"No, but your butt is..." I started.
"Nice," added 'kid in white'.
I was going for "dusty", but whatever... Would it have been weirder coming from a female student? I can't tell.
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